The Process

This is where I'll start... at the beginning.

A few years ago.... The Mr. decided he like to have more children... our were growing up, fast... faster than he liked. Already one had flown the nest and was mostly put together, then the second was off... like a flash we were down to one, who really didn't need us anymore ('cepting the occasional, Dad=Atm) He was not liking the whole empty nest thing. Well, he finally wore me down and I agreed to Foster Parenting. We started in Louisiana with all the hoops! Classes where we learned all the stuff you can't do... (WOW... who knew, kneeling on rice as a punishment? ) I have to say I was amazed at the stuff some people thought up. The background checks, the family backgrounds, the sheer amount of paperwork. The home inspections... (Once again.... you have to have doors, who'd have thunk it?) After all that we were licensed for Foster/Adoption. I have to say it was probably the hardest thing I've ever done. 

We started with two boys, (in Louisiana) sweet boys who knew they were going to be placed with family, they just need a little time to jump through the hoops... So everybody knew it was a temporary deal. But still.... when they left it was a bit teary for me. I can report that both boys are doing well. So I'm very happy! 

On to Texas, where I had decided I couldn't do it again.... it's really hard. To be a good foster parent you really have to open not only you home but your heart... it's hard to take a kid who's been so hurt, who know there are monsters under the bed and the things that go bump in the night really can hurt them, whether it's being neglected or down right abused kids don't understand it's not them, but those who are supposed to take care of them. It's painful to know that they been let down and learned the hardest lessons life has to teach. But the Mr. is very persuasive, and how do you say no?

More hoops, more paperwork.... more inspections.... more background checks and not only on us, but our families as well. In Texas any person that visits your home on a regular basis has to have a background check, while I do understand the need... really I do. It is somewhat isolating, our good friends didn't mind and were fine with it.... but the neighbors and casual friends, I for one didn't want to ask that of them it's invasive. But some of our stuff from Louisiana transferred, most of the classes for instance... we only had to do 3, two hour classes as opposed to the 6 two hour classes.

 But finally we were once again licensed this time we started out as just adoption, after a couple of months and applying (and not hearing back) on a couple of boys the Mr. and I talked about flipping over to Foster/Adopt and bang.... we got the call for Our Little Guy! He came directly from the hospital, where he was being treated for severe burns to his foot. It did wind up being ruled an accident. His Mother jumped through all the hoops and really worked her case plan... mostly very diligently with only a few minor setbacks. However after meeting her family it's easy to see she just wasn't taught the basics, like how to keep house or that you really should shower everyday... with soap. Good thing  all of that is teachable.... as long as the responsible person is willing and able to learn, and as far as Our Little Guys mom was concerned, she was willing and mostly able. Will she back slide?... possibly.... will she keep it together....  I hope so.(Hope and Pray!) I do know she was and is trying and I guess that's all that matters. The last I heard The Department had closed their case against her and Our Little Guy is doing pretty good.... with just a few stubborn issues at school.... (Go figure). But I have faith....

The story continues...

While cruising The Heart Galleries, (if you are interested...  Every state has The Heart Galleries,  http://www.heartgalleryofamerica.org/  where most of the waiting kids get placed ) The Mr. came across Three, yes 3 boys waiting for a home.... something about these 3 touched him... and me too. But we really weren't  looking for 3, just one, but we kept going back to the brothers. As it happens Our Little Guys caseworker, the Fabulous Miss V, was also The Brothers caseworker when they first came into the system. It seemed a sign, if you believe in such things. She told us the whole of the story and who their current casework was. In Texas if you have a chance of going home you have a regular caseworker, if you are going to be placed in a adoptive placement you have a adoption placement caseworker. In short order we had all the information we needed. Then it was off to meet all the appropriate people, all the caseworkers, the CASA worker, (CASA is kind of like an Guardian ad Litem, all volunteer,  http://www.casaforchildren.org/site/c.mtJSJ7MPIsE/b.5301295/k.BE9A/Home.htm ), The supervisors, the Fosterparents and the file on the Boyz, (light reading.... OMG ) More paperwork, a Hi this is who who are book, more interviews, and several 24 hour waiting peiods, and we were set to meet the boyz....                        

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